The holidays are a time for joy, connection, and delicious meals—but let’s face it, they can also bring unsolicited comments about our bodies from well-meaning (or not-so-well-meaning) relatives. Whether it’s a passing remark about weight, what’s on your plate, or outdated beauty ideals, these comments can be hurtful and draining.
This year, let’s set boundaries, build confidence, and focus on loving ourselves—because the only opinions about your body that truly matter are your own.
1. Anticipate and Prepare
Sometimes, just knowing what to expect can help you handle situations with grace. If you have a family member who always brings up body-related topics, prepare some responses in advance. For example:
- “I’m focusing on how I feel, not how I look.”
- “Thanks for your concern, but I’m happy with myself right now.”
Practicing these phrases can help you feel more confident in the moment.
2. Redirect the Conversation
When a comment veers into uncomfortable territory, shift the focus:
- If someone mentions your weight or food choices, respond with: “Let’s talk about something more interesting—how was your trip?”
- If someone offers backhanded compliments like “You look so good now,” you can smile and say, “I’ve always looked good.”
Changing the subject helps you take control without escalating the situation.
3. Set Boundaries Early
If you know certain topics are likely to come up, consider setting boundaries beforehand. As you prepare to sit down for dinner, don’t hesitate to express that you’re tired of conversations revolving around diets or weight loss for the New Year. You could even steer the discussion toward more meaningful and engaging topics like travel, career milestones, or personal growth—subjects that foster connection and positivity, not shame.
Boundaries aren’t rude—they’re a powerful form of self-care. By taking a stand, you’re not only protecting your peace but also setting an example for others on how to maintain a more supportive inner and outer dialogue.
In other words, tell that Karen to quiet down and eat a bread roll!
4. Focus on Self-Confidence
The best armor against judgmental comments is a strong sense of self-worth. Reframe negative thoughts by practicing gratitude for what your body does for you. Celebrate how it allows you to hug loved ones, laugh over meals, dance and enjoy time spent with your closest friends and family.
Your body doesn’t dictate anything else about you other than simply being a body that allows you to live.
5. Create a Body-Positive Space
If you’re spending time with supportive friends or relatives, lean into those connections. Surrounding yourself with positivity and encouragement can help offset any negativity you encounter.
6. Remember: Their Comments Say More About Them
Often, comments about your body are reflections of the commenter’s insecurities, biases, or outdated ideas—not you. You are not obligated to carry their baggage, and having the confidence to stand up to these comments could be a moment of empowerment for you, and a much needed realization for them.
7. Prioritize Joy Over Judgment
At the end of the day, the holidays are about creating memories, savoring special moments, and cherishing the people (and meals!) that bring you joy. Don’t let negativity distract you from what truly matters.
This holiday season, choose to celebrate yourself exactly as you are. Confidence isn’t about fitting into someone else’s mold—it’s about embracing your own. You deserve to enjoy every bit of this season without apology or guilt.